You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
