She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
it's like iHOP with fire
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
