he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Randomize
