C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
