Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
