I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Randomize
