so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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