I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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