So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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