theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize