i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
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