If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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