16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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