Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
