return my video game
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
