There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize