you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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