But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
