What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
