ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
