i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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