it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My vagina just recognized that song.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
