we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
