I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize