the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
she told me i tasted like america
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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