it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
