Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize