Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
