last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize