A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
