I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
well most of my day revolves around power hour
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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