Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
My life is pants optional.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize