"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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