I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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