I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize