Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize