ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
