You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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