Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Still dying that you shit outside
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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