So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
