somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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