Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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