A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
