shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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