you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
This baby is an asshole
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
