how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
