We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
