why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
