when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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