I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
