shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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