OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize